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LWhere have the goodÿ
Lparties gone?ÿ
L2Written by Tyrant/CADAVERÿ
Iðhaveðbeenðaðscenememberðforðsome
yearsðnow,ðandðthatðalsoðmeansðthatð
I
haveðattendedðtoðquiteðaðfew
"computer-parties"ðnow...ðAndðhereðis
anðarticleðaboutðthoseðkindaðpartiesðin
general...
L1SFirst impressionÿ
Largeðhallsðovercrowdedðwithðcomputer
freaksðwhichðallðseemðtoðbeðwatching
newðpornopicturesðorðX-copy,ðifðthey
areð
notð
playingð
að
newð
gameð ofð course...
-ð
Mostð
ofð
theð "computer-parties"ð Ið have
beenðtoðhaveðbeenðratherðnoisyðtoo...
Guessðit'sðhardðtoðavoidðsuchðnoise
whenð
theð
partiesð
seemsð
toð
containð
að
lot
ofðpersonsðthatðwantðtoð"impress"ðthe
othersðwithðtheirð"great"ðhi-fiðsystems
playingðno-no-limits...ð(Argh!)
Then,ðafterðIð
haveð
beenð
atð
að
fewð
of
theseðcomputer-partiesðIðsitðbackðwith
thisðimpression;
Howðtheðfuckðshallðpeopleðgetðto
communicateðwithðothersðatðthese
partiesðifðtheyðaren'tðinðaðfamous
groupðalready?ð-Itðseemsðlikeðmostðof
theðdudesðthatðattendðtoðsuchðparties
areðeither;
A)ðSleeping
B)ðSearchingð forð somebodyðthatðthey
alreadyðknow.
C)ðHuntingð
forð
"nyeuð hottð werz"
Ifð
youð
haveð
broughtð
withð
youð
að
large
plasticbagðfilledðwithðgamesðyouðwill
easilyðgetð400ðnewðfriendsðatðthese
parties,ðbut...
Afterðyouðhaveðbeenðspendingðan
entireðdayðatðaðcomputer-partyðyou
startðtoðgetðreallyðtired,ðandðyouðare
justðwaitingðforðtheðcompotitionðto
startðsoðthatðyouðcanðgoðhome...ðThis
isðofðcourseðnotðbeforeð3ðorðfourðdays!
(Double-Argh!)
Ofð
course,ð
theð
partiesð
canð
beð rather
funðifðyouðareðtheðbestð"something."
Cozðifðyouðhaveðaðplateðwithðyourðown
handleðyouðcanðbeðsureðthatðhundredsðof
smallðcreaturesðwillðstartðdrawlingðall
overðyourðleg,ðsoðthatðitðlooksðlikeðif
youðhaveðpissedðinðyourðownðpants...
Thisðisðwhatðsomebodyðcallðfun,ðbut
whichðmostðothersðcallðrather
annoying...ðIðreallyðdon'tðthinkðthat
thisðkindðofðaðpopularityðleadsðtoðany
dramaticðchangesðinðyourð"sexual
penetrationsðaðmonth-statistics"ð-ButðI
couldðbeðwrong...
Andðallðtheðlamersðrunningðaroundðin
theðhallðcanðbeðreallyðannoying.ðI'm
sureðthatðyouðallðhaveðnoticedðthe
smallð
kidsð
huntingð
forð
Bubbleð
Bobbleð
4,
theðAGA-versionðwithð256ðcoloursðof
course!ð(Wow!ðIsðthatðversionðout
yet?ð*8D-(
L1SWhat's the puncline?ÿ
Theðpunchlineðisðjustðtheðfactðthat
mostðofðtheð
computer-partiesð
suck!ð
And
Iðmeanðsuck,ðlikeðinðtheðgoodðold
BeavisðandðButtheadðcartoons!ðYeah,
majorðsuck!ðWithðtheðcapitalð"S"!!!
Doð youð getð theð pictureð orð what?
Ofðcourse,ðweðcanðallðbecomeðrather
impressedðwhenðweðseeðourðown
productionsðatðaðlargeðscreenðand
everything...ðGreatðsoundðandðall...
-Butðhey,ðman!ðIðdon'tðwantðtoðtravel
farð distancesð usingð hugeðsumsðofðmoney
atðtravelling-feeð+ðCocaðColaðjust
becauseðofðaðlargeðscreenðfilledðwith
lot'sðofðVector-objectsðandðsoundðthat
makeð
yourð
pantsð
shake.ð
-Ið
wantð
more!
L1SMaybe I sound demanding, but hey;ÿ
Whereðisðtheð24H-a-dayðdance-music?
Whereð
areð
theð
girls?
Whereð isð theð booze?
Whereð isð theð fun?
-Shortly;
Whereð areð theð coOLðparties?
Nope,ðsomethingðdrasticðhaveðtoðbe
doneðwithðtheðcomingðsoðcalledðparties
thatðtheðscenemembersðarrangeðinðthe
future.ðOfðcourseðweðneedðthe
compotitions,ðcozðit'sðbecauseð
ofð
those
(andð it'sð prizes)ð thatð weð getð soð "many"
newðdemoesðeveryðyear...ðButðwhyðnot
haveðtheðcompotionðatðtheðfirstðday,
andð thenð justð useð theð lastð daysð onðreal
partying?
-Partying?ðWhatðdoðyouðmean?ðIsn'tðit
funðtoðcopyðtheðnewestðgamesðaso?
Hellð0no!ð/Partyingð/means;
(trancelatedðtoðenglish:)ðBoozing,ðfun,
girls,ðfuckingðaso...ð-Justðlookðup
theðwordðinðyourð
englishð
dictionaryð
and
thenðyou'llðsurelyðfindðallðthese
mentionedðwordsðprintedðwithðlarge
letters!ðIðcanðguarantieðit!
L1SThe coming parties;ÿ
Yeah,ðtheyðhaveðtoðbeðdifferent!ðAnd
firstðofðallðweðhaveðtoðdropðallðthose
stoopidðrules!ðTheðrulesðmakeðmeðgo
sick!ð(Tripple-Argh!)
-Noðalcohol?ðWhatðkindðofðaðruleðis
that?ðWhyðnotðjustðwrite;ðNoðfun?ð-A
partyðwithoutðalcoholðisðnoðfunðatðall!
Andðwhereðareðtheðdancefloorsðandðthe
hornyðchicks?ð-Don'tðbotherðtoðcall
yourðpartyðaðpartyðifðtheseðaren't
included...ðPartiesðwithoutðgirlsðare
somethingðthatðonlyðtheðtrueðcomputer-
geeksðcouldðhaveðinvented..ðWhy?ðIt's
ofð courseð becauseðtheyðareðallðnerds!
-Ifðweðsomehowðshallðmanageðtoðget
ridðofðthisð"computer-nerd-image"
(whichð
Ið
thinkð mostð ofð youð scenemembers
don'tðlike!)ðthenðweðhaveðtoðgetðsome
moreðfun,ðgirlsðandðboozeðintoðour
parties!ð-AndðI'llðpromise;ðWhenðwe,
theðamiga-scene,ðmanageðtoðmakeðcoOL
partiesð(likeðtheðonesðI'mðtalking
about!)ðthenðweðwillðhaveðlot'sðof
girlsðinvadingðourðsceneðtoo!
Soðthen,ðtheðnextðpartyðI'llðattend
toðwillðbeðaðpartyðfullðofðbooze,
girls,ðfunð&ðofð
courseð
partyingð
asð
hell
withðallðofðmyðcontacts!ð-ðButðbe
sure,ð
Ið
won'tð
comeð
toð
anymoreð ofð those
otherðboringð"computer-parties";ðThey
areðnoðmoreðthanð"copy-arrangements"
forðlamers,ðnerdsðandðloosersðofðthe
society!
-Doðanyðofðyouðscenepeopleðtakeðthe
challenge?ðDoðanyðofðyouðdareðto
arrangeðaðrealðpartyðfullðofðbooze,
drugsðandðfun?ðOrðareðyouðallð
nerds?
IðhopeðthatðsomeðofðyouðareðcoOL,ðor
elseðIðdon'tðthinkðthatðI'llðever
attendðtoðanyðpartiesðmore...ð(Of
courseðI'llðkeepðonðattendingðtoðlocal
parties,ðbutð
notð
anyð
"computer-parties"
anyway...)
Signed,ðTyrantð"TheðcoOLðone"ð*8)-(=: